Ok, I didn't write yesterday. I don't have an excuse, I just didn't feel like writing cause I was tired and concentration-less.
The day 15, Monday, was a happy day (like a happy hour, but longer). I spent the whole afternoon and evening with a good friend who lives abroad and whom I didn't see in a very long time, so I gave yesterday to her. I enjoyed the time spent with her immensely and I wish I could see more of her.
Before I met her I was very productive at work and I felt great about it.
Today was also good.
I came back from a long walk with Munja about hour and a half ago and I've been reading some articles up to now. I am all introspective these days and I have a feeling I need more and more of it since there are still questions that I don't know the answers to. Some of them are very important for me to answer in order to define my goals more precisely and in accordance with my true self and I need the time to think through them all. That is mostly what I spend my free time on these days.
I am wandering about this project of mine also. I was asking myself if what I think I want to achieve is really what my soul wants or is my ego making me do things. Today I made a list of things I am interested in (professionally or as a hobby) together with a list of things that motivate me to do them. I was actually not surprised with what I have found out and as much as I didn't like the truth, I had to be honest with myself. This is already too personal so I am not going to reveal more, but I think I came to some truths that are scaring the hell out of me and making me happy at the same time. It's rather confusing, but I think today I know more than I did yesterday so I am moving forward and toward my dreams. At least I think I am.
Before I took Munja for a night walk I read some more of those articles, asked myself questions and wrote some answers in my book. It's like self shrinking and I am actually enjoying it, but what I am afraid of is that I will spend too much time thinking and do no real action. On the other hand, I am afraid that I might make a bad decision if I force myself to make it faster just because the time is passing by, and there is this vicious circle I am in again. It's like that with me. I have to measure zillion times before I make a decision. But once I do, that is it!
It was all after I did some more of that boring work I do only for the money (talking about motives...). I got the money and comparing the amount of work I did with the amount of money I got for it - I can say it was a good deal. The money is tempting and I need it since my paycheck is late as always, but the work is boring as hell and I hate it and I am close to NOT WANTING TO DO IT ANYMORE!
Before that I went to my parents place for lunch and took Munja for a walk.
I came home from work earlier due to some meeting I didn't have to attend (thank God, again) and I was sent home. I felt like reading a book and that is what I did before I went to lunch.
I got up feeling good and I had a plan for today. But nothing went according to it. Bad plan or bad course of action? Maybe both?
'Till tomorrow,
cheers!
The day 15, Monday, was a happy day (like a happy hour, but longer). I spent the whole afternoon and evening with a good friend who lives abroad and whom I didn't see in a very long time, so I gave yesterday to her. I enjoyed the time spent with her immensely and I wish I could see more of her.
Before I met her I was very productive at work and I felt great about it.
Today was also good.
I came back from a long walk with Munja about hour and a half ago and I've been reading some articles up to now. I am all introspective these days and I have a feeling I need more and more of it since there are still questions that I don't know the answers to. Some of them are very important for me to answer in order to define my goals more precisely and in accordance with my true self and I need the time to think through them all. That is mostly what I spend my free time on these days.
I am wandering about this project of mine also. I was asking myself if what I think I want to achieve is really what my soul wants or is my ego making me do things. Today I made a list of things I am interested in (professionally or as a hobby) together with a list of things that motivate me to do them. I was actually not surprised with what I have found out and as much as I didn't like the truth, I had to be honest with myself. This is already too personal so I am not going to reveal more, but I think I came to some truths that are scaring the hell out of me and making me happy at the same time. It's rather confusing, but I think today I know more than I did yesterday so I am moving forward and toward my dreams. At least I think I am.
Before I took Munja for a night walk I read some more of those articles, asked myself questions and wrote some answers in my book. It's like self shrinking and I am actually enjoying it, but what I am afraid of is that I will spend too much time thinking and do no real action. On the other hand, I am afraid that I might make a bad decision if I force myself to make it faster just because the time is passing by, and there is this vicious circle I am in again. It's like that with me. I have to measure zillion times before I make a decision. But once I do, that is it!
It was all after I did some more of that boring work I do only for the money (talking about motives...). I got the money and comparing the amount of work I did with the amount of money I got for it - I can say it was a good deal. The money is tempting and I need it since my paycheck is late as always, but the work is boring as hell and I hate it and I am close to NOT WANTING TO DO IT ANYMORE!
Before that I went to my parents place for lunch and took Munja for a walk.
I came home from work earlier due to some meeting I didn't have to attend (thank God, again) and I was sent home. I felt like reading a book and that is what I did before I went to lunch.
I got up feeling good and I had a plan for today. But nothing went according to it. Bad plan or bad course of action? Maybe both?
'Till tomorrow,
cheers!
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